Category: Depression

Holiday Blues Revisited

Dr. Holzmacher's Business LogoThank God!  The holidays are over.  This is a common harangue at this time of the year.  It seems ridiculous that a time of year intended to give thanks and count one’s blessings should lead to so much tension.  Perhaps the unintended consequence is ridiculous, but the ill effects are not.  There are many reasons why people become depressed at this time of year, and here are a few.  First, the way the Christmas Holiday has been configured in America, it is maximized towards the desires of young children, as their gifts comprise the greatest slice of the economic picture.  This echoes the direction of motion pictures to offer material enjoyed by the adolescent and young adult ticket purchasers.  This is not an evil plan, to my knowledge, but the typical manifestation of a market to make the most of its opportunities.  This does not mean that it will be welcomed by all members of our society, as is clearly the case.  Listening to one’s children complain about the paucity or selection of the gifts can infuse the occasion with a sense of meaninglessness.  If you are a middle-class American, it is likely you turned in the same performance as a child.

Second, the holidays tend to bring back memories of loved ones that are no longer around.  Whether they are deceased or merely estranged is less important than the way we are affected by the distance.  There may be an unfulfilled need for this person, or a desire to make amends and reestablish contact.  Either way the affected person may be morose or even mildly depressed at a time when we are all supposed to be happy.  The expectation that one should be particularly happy during this time of year makes thoughts of loss and longing especially burdensome.

Third, what of this social obligation to be happy during the holidays?  Social demands form the core of culture, and we tend to experience feelings when we accomplish or ignore cultural demands.  Even if a person is not particularly sad during the holidays, there is an expectation of being happier than usual.  If we do not acquiesce to this social demand, we are apt to feel guilt at the lack of our responsiveness.  Another perception is anger at being subtly told how to think and feel, even if the consequences of not conforming are nothing more than disapproving looks.  The behavioral literature is bursting with examples of  how controlling another person’s behavior tends to increase the pressure to resist.  People do not like to be pushed into ways of thinking and feeling; unless they believe it was at their initiative.
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Fourth, and perhaps the least discussed, is the holidays bring us into contact with people we may not like.  Many friends and patients describe the familial and work obligations that are less than enjoyable.  Perhaps due to the social demand of being happy and friendly during the holidays, most people tend not to acknowledge this potentially unpleasant aspect of the season.  Even in the closest of family and work relationships, there are people one would rather not see more than once per year-if that!  To buck and bridle about visiting the besotted “Uncle Jimmy” runs the risk of  being branded a “Scrooge.”  See, there is even a special designation for those unfortunates who do not have the appropriate “Christmas spirit.”

What can one do to stem the tide of emotions that flood during the holidays?  The first is an automatic response to most mental health issues.  Wait.  Most of the negative emotions dissipate rapidly after the holiday season.  Watching the apparently unappreciative children enjoying their toys, and besotted Uncle Jimmy wearing your gift, tends to ameliorate the initial reaction.  January is a “git back to work” month when few expect to be particularly happy.  Nature obligingly provides cold cloudy days to accomplish all the accumulated work.  It seems a bit natural to be down in January, such that the social expectation to be joyful nearly vanishes!  As in my other posts on depression, the typical waiting period is three to six months.  If your depressive symptoms do not lessen within this time frame, it is likely that a depressive disorder has caught hold and will require professional treatment.  Fortunately for most, the negative aspects of this season fade from view as the more positive aspects take hold in one’s memory.  Please leave comments regarding this post in the section below.

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categories Depression, Psychology | | datetime January 3, 2011 11:05 am | comments Comments Off on Holiday Blues Revisited

Depression-Existential

Joseph Holzmacher's Business Logo for Orlandopsych.comIt is a dark day when our lives lose meaning and purpose.  Most people do not realize that their lives are predicated on implicit assumptions.  Most people take these axioms of their life for granted.  If one lives a relatively trouble free life, these implicit assumptions may never be shaken.  It is rare to find someone that can hang labels on their reasons to live; that have insight into the meaning of their existence.  We all hope our life will sail along so calmly that one’s assumptions about the nature of water will never be called into question.  Unfortunately, calm seas and favorable winds are not the norm, such that we are often unrealistic navigators of our own life.

When people tell me that their life has lost meaning and/or purpose, I typically ask what had been the guiding meaning of their lives.  Without exception, people do not have a ready answer.  They know when it is gone, but are vague about its essence when present.  A common purpose of life is to raise children to be successful adults.  Most adults, especially older adults, readily agree that raising children was the central purpose of their lives.  Roughly half of my adult patients find their work to be meaningful.  It is rare for someone to voice an implicit meaning to their lives without naming one or the other, work and/or children.  It is rare for people to name an intimate partner as the primary reason to live, or activities outside of work as giving meaning and purpose to one’s life.  Exceptions to this rule often occur in childless couples and people who have talent in the arts, but the key word here is exception.

Nonetheless, the world of social media the cheapest cialis is ever changing with a number of brand new platforms coming up every year. Earlier, people were not much aware with the problem, but now every 3rd or 4th male in discount generic viagra http://foea.org/?product=5839 the world. When foea.org buy cheap levitra you don’t drink, your body will manifest alcohol withdrawal symptoms. A few small transgressions won’t do harm to your auditory generic viagra sildenafil system thereby causing tinnitus. Is there an overriding meaning to life?  Can one climb the mountain and obtain an epiphany of the true transcendent meaning of life?  I do not think so.  Meaning and purpose are unique to the individual, yet there are similarities between individuals.  Meaning is congruent with one’s upbringing and experiences, and so the flavor will be change from person-to-person.  For example, the purpose of raising children for many people is to send them to college, for others to marry and have grandchildren, and yet others want someone to shield them from the ravages of aging.  While all three world views center about the meaning of children in their lives, the purpose and goals of each is different.  If one’s vocation fills them with meaning and purpose, is it because of the assistance they render to others, the money they make, or the competitors they crush?  Here again we find one meaning and three divergent forms of purpose.

The first step in discovering one’s new meaning in life, the new purpose of one’s existence, is to analyze the nature of the old meaning.  It is natural to assume some aspect of the past was a golden age in one’s life, but thorough examination always reveals troubles that had to be surmounted.  Know that there is no one grand overriding meaning, but whatever meanings and purposes are congruent with your particular beliefs and values.  By way of example, I became close to an older adult patient while training for my degree(s).  He was a very loving husband and father.  His family held him in the highest regard.  They were understandably shocked by his first Major Depression occurring at over seventy years of age.  Even before my awareness of these existential issues, it was evident that he no longer felt useful in life.  He was satisfied by his performance as a parent, having met the goals he set for himself as a father.  The patient became increasingly aware of the satisfaction he experienced mentoring younger business people.  He truly enjoyed mentoring others, and more importantly, it became central to his self-image and purpose in life.  After discharge, the patient became involved in consulting to small businesses.  Until the time of his death, many years later, the patient was not only free of depression, but contented with his retirement as well.  Please leave comments regarding this post in the space provided below.

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categories Depression, Psychology | | datetime October 23, 2010 11:09 am | comments Comments Off on Depression-Existential

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